A chronicle of the whimsical jaunts of this guy as he goes around some foreign places looking for food.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Stuck in Lodi... Amsterdam... again

Apparently this place was the wealthiest city in the world in the 16th Century. By the opulence and grandeur of the buildings around, that's not hard to believe. For a country which decides to, instead of attempting to legislate and police universal "problems" such as soft drug crime and prostitution, they legalize them and contain them. Although the right and correct American way of dealing with the problem is spending billions of dollars policing and prosecuting soft drug crime, and yet they still haven't beaten the menace. It's all so ridiculous when you break it down. Why not just make all forms of intoxicant illegal? Tobacco, alcohol, pain-killers? Try and see how effective that would be.

The most significant problem in Amsterdam, from my relatively uninformed eyes, seems to be petty theft. The city posts hilarious cartoon signs warning people to watch their bags and keep their eyes open. Other than that, the greatest public issue seems to be the dogs that run around and defecate on the streets with impunity. As an Ambassador from the great nation of America, I propose that we legislate special police units to track down these violators of God's infallible laws and lock them all up!

The dogs and cats of the city seem to have it quite nice. I've never seen cats roam around the street, not 7 feet from streets populated by countless bikes and darting vans, and seem to not care in the least.

Just like the butterflies, I don't know where those cats go when it rains. Just like the Northwest, Amsterdam falls victim to brief and intense belches of rain once a day or so. All the newspaper stands magically apparate plastic coverings for their magazines and the tourists run for the nearest awning. For me, it seems the perfect oppotunity to drop by a bar and have an Amstel while the situation sorts itself out.

However, just as Japanese economy cars and brash German sedans dominate the transportation infrastructure of California, the bicycles are the preferred method of locomotion. There are also ever-present trams that reach pretty much every nook of the city. A superior way to play, I think.

For now, I've ditched the hostel in lieu of a nice, cramped hotel room. Run by a guy name Otto who is missing many fingers, it seems to be the perfect compromise of comfort and price. It's right on the edge of Vondel Park, adjacent to the museum district. For all intents and purposes, a good location.

I'm off again, to see which way today will drag me.



Anonymous "The Old Ones" said...

Might you hear footfalls following you around, such as those from all the tulip growers in the past, scampering to make sure those dogs and cats select somewhere else to solve their most immediate problems. I scarcely think so in as much as casual mention has been made of the more than occasional downpour of cleansing solution not too infrequently descending from the powers above, removing if but temporarily from any surface that which has had the audacity to appear where it doesn't belong. As inhabitant of other areas seek the cover of awnings during such an event, it is quite fortunate indeed that your "awning" has more the appearance of a comfortable bar which happens to have that which for the moment is your favorite liquid refreshment. Fortunate indeed for in order for the moving finger to continue it's writing, it's imperative to have these brief moments of renewal. Glad to hear that you are nowhere near the danger zone. Press on with continued curiosity and stay safe, Omar......

7/07/2005 9:09 AM  
Blogger John the Apostate said...

I'm pleased to hear that your voyage has already become an adventure but am curious as to when it will become a trip. Sounds like this Otto lost a few bets too many, possibly to heavy machinery (always wear eye protection).
It's good to hear from you, buddy.
Keeping vigilant watch,
John the Apostate

7/07/2005 7:19 PM  
Anonymous Daddi-o said...

Well,now... Aren't you glad you weren't taking a tram in jolly ol' England today. Seems that the french might be angry with the 2012 Olympic site? Be vigilant and always look up AND down (pet offal) before you step I always say, or do I? Sounds as if there are sights to be seen and ales to be quaffed in that little hamlet. So, have a great adventure and maybe send some pictures along the old "information superhighway" while tripping along in the windmill country in your wooden shoes. Tah-tah for now.....

7/07/2005 8:16 PM  
Anonymous joylessness said...

casey...chocolate. and yes, pictures. b,m & i currently discussing your personage. i'm taking up smoking. matt's hair is all gone. (shock) and bryon may never leave his bed again.

7/07/2005 9:41 PM  

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